"But remember, just because you may have pulled someone’s pants down when walking him into school yesterday, this isn’t all your fault. It’s just…in five months I’m gonna be a teenager, and I don’t want to be the one in this house turning mental and making the laundry basket smell funny. By the time you’re watching this I will be far away living wild in the forest. Carving myself a smoking hot forest wife from a fallen log. I’ll return to you when I’m a man. You’ll recognize me because I’ll be the one with the badass mustache riding a grizzly bear. Peace. I love you all."